Methods to Use With Passive-aggressive People

Method 6. Consequences to behavior

Another way of responding to PA behavior is through consequences. For instance, if you determine that the person is not receptive or if they are malicious, walk away. Don't give them the reward of being drawn into their PA game.

Sometimes it may not be possible to completely walk away, in which case you need to set limits. Do not be shy to set these limits clearly and loudly “Stop!” or “I'm not going to discuss this.” Many PA people, especially the malicious ones, count on you to be “too” nice. Instead, being firm can sometimes stop their behavior.

Another way to set limits when someone's PA behavior interferes with something you are doing is to stop doing it. For example, if you ask for help doing the laundry and your family member responds in a PA manner: don't do their laundry. Or, when someone is trying to get attention through PA behavior: don't give them attention.

Next: Learn how to use reward to increase desired behavior and reduce PA behavior.