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Question: I'm an adult child living at home. My mother makes me so angry but she is always so nice about it. She'll tell me, "Honey, we're trying to treat you like an adult, but you're not thinking this through and making good decisions." Anything I try to do she finds fault with but she does it in a nice way, "Are you sure that is what you want to do?" I don't choose the right career. I can't eat right. I can't spend my time in the right way. Why can't I just make mistakes and learn from them? It's my life! If I get angry, she's just clueless and claims, "I'm just trying to help you become independent."
Response: This is one of the more difficult passive-aggressive (PA) scenarios because the mother probably isn't even aware of how she comes across and most likely has good intentions of "helping" her daughter. Often this occurs because the parent feels she has to raise her child "right" and doesn't want the child to make mistakes because that would reflect poorly upon her as a mother. The problem, however, is that it often leads to the child questioning herself, doubting herself, and unable to make decisions.Copyright © 2015 by Excel At Life, LLC.
Permission to reprint this article for non-commercial use is granted if it includes this entire copyright and an active link.
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