The Porcupine Effect: Pushing Others Away When You Want to Connect
by Monica A. Frank, Ph.D.
What is the "Porcupine Effect" and how can it impact your life?
The Plight of the Prickly Porcupine
Describes the "Porcupine Effect": how the distress of rejection can cause the perception of rejection which may result in being rejected.
When Rejection is an Illusion
Describes how perceived rejection can be wrong. Discusses the four desires for relationships and when those desires can lead to inaccurate
feelings of rejection.
Discusses ways to think of perceived rejection differently and how to think about actual rejection. Describes some methods to help change
thinking about rejection.
Desire for Love vs. Demand for Romantic Love
Identifies how romanticized versions of love can lead to feelings of rejection and how to think differently about love relationships.
When You Know You Are a Porcupine
Discusses rules for relationships when you are sensitive to rejection. Identifies ways to change your behavior so your sensitivity doesn't
impact your relationships.
When People Are Mean
Reasons for Perception of Meanness Inventory--helps you to determine why other people's behavior is not a rejection of you but is unintentional or due to their personal problems.