PsychNotes December 2015
by Monica A. Frank, Ph.D.
Clinical and Sport Psychologist
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December 28, 2015
Reflecting on a Time of Change for Me
I haven't written much lately because I have been busy wrapping up my old life to start a new life. Recently, I retired from my clinical practice which also involved selling my home and moving to another part of the state. Having grown up and lived in the suburbs of a large metropolitan area, I will now be adjusting to living on forty acres in a very rural area. Instead of a clinical practice, I will be able to focus more on my writing and app development.
Although this change in my life is by choice and something I am looking forward to, change involves loss. I will miss the direct contact I have with clients. I will miss the tears and the laughter. I will miss sharing their successes and commiserating over their losses.
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December 22, 2015
Cognitive Diary Training Example: Back-stabbing Doctor
The following is a two-part response which includes both this Cognitive Diary Training Example and a
Passive-Aggressive Example.
EVENT: Colleague is passive-aggressive in front of the residents.
EMOTIONS: frustration, hurt, distress
DISTRESS RATING: 9--Feeling desperate
THOUGHTS: "A doctor I work with feels I am "too proud" and independent in my work. He dislikes my personality, and that's ok--we don't have to be buddies. But he has taken to telling each new group of residents that there is no point discussing anything with me because I am overbearing. He tells them they should just avoid discussion and agree with me. When I present an assessment in rounds he covers his eyes and bows his head. After he leaves, if I need to speak to one of the residents about a patient having problems, I can see them bracing themselves as I approach or rolling their eyes even though we may have never yet spoken to each other! I am viewed as a competant and compassionate doctor by families and co-workers, but this treatment is distracting and disheartening. It is making it difficult to provide safe care, to the point that I have considered leaving my practice.”
CAN YOU IDENTIFY THE IRRATIONAL THINKING IN THIS EXAMPLE? There are at least 3 irrational beliefs.
HOW CAN YOU CHANGE THE THINKING? What is another way of thinking about the situation that won't cause the feelings of frustration, hurt, and distress?
TAP HERE FOR ANSWER
December 19, 2015
Passive-Aggressive Example: Back-stabbing Doctor
Question: A doctor I work with feels I am "too proud" and independent in my work. He dislikes my personality, and that's ok--we don't have to be buddies. But he has taken to telling each new group of residents that there is no point discussing anything with me because I am overbearing. He tells them they should just avoid discussion and agree with me. When I present an assessment in rounds he covers his eyes and bows his head. After he leaves, if I need to speak to one of the residents about a patient having problems, I can see them bracing themselves as I approach or rolling their eyes even though we may have never yet spoken to each other! I am viewed as a competant and compassionate doctor by families and co-workers, but this treatment is distracting and disheartening. It is making it difficult to provide safe care, to the point that I have considered leaving my practice.
TAP HERE FOR RESPONSE
December 12, 2015
Do You Understand Me? Conflict in Relationships
No matter what, people will have conflict. Two people will never have the same exact needs as one another. One person is too hot; one person is too cold. One person likes Chinese food; one person likes Italian. One person spends more; one person is thrifty. Some differences may cause more conflict than others but differences always exists.
Why is it that conflict can cause serious problems in some relationships but does not seem to affect others? Researchers Gordon and Chen (2015) examined the quality of relationships based upon whether the partners felt understood by the other. They found that conflict is less likely to be harmful to a relationship when the partners feel understood.
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December 10, 2015
Children Prefer Activity
When given the choice, children prefer being active. We worry about the problem of obesity and inactivity in children, yet it appears the problem has more to do with opportunity than with preference. Of course children like to play games, and if their only opportunity is to play sedentary, solitary games that is what they will play. However, when children, especially boys and normal-weight children, have the opportunity to play physically interactive games or similar non-physical games, they will choose the more active games (Sit, et al., 2010).
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December 2, 2015
The Truth about Aging and Dieting
One good thing about aging is that older adults can stick to a diet better than younger adults. One of the more common causes of dieting failure is the use of food to regulate emotions. Older adults are better at managing emotional reactions and less likely to feel bad about themselves due to a diet failure. Instead of becoming discouraged by diet lapses and eating more they tend to control eating better. Instead of “I failed in my diet today. I'll start over tomorrow” they are more likely to think “I'll try to do better for the rest of the day.”
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