PSYCHNOTES
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March 28, 2012
March 6, 2012
February 25, 2012
NOVEMBER 14, 2011
SEPTEMBER 19, 2011
The best way to understand intensity is that it is a physiological reaction to the competitive situation. We experience physical symptoms that can either help us or hinder us. Sometimes this can vary with the individual, other times it varies with the sport or the situation.
JULY 17, 2011
"We need to determine the validity of our emotions before we act on them."
JULY 16, 2011
"One major problem with demand thinking is that it creates a great deal of unnecessary stress."
JULY 15, 2011
You have probably heard some variation of Albert Einstein's definition of insanity: “Doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.” This definition has been popularized by pop psychology and marketing gurus to emphasize the importance of taking a different approach to solving a problem. Basically, the idea is you can't keep engaging in the same unsuccessful or even self-destructive behavior and expect that you will succeed next time.
JULY 5, 2011
"Why are people so mean?" seems to be a plaintive cry across the internet. Although the issue may be more prevalent online due to the anonymity and accessibility, it is by no means limited to the online community. Yet, other people's “meanness” impacts us more than it really needs to. The more that people can recognize that the meanness they experience from others is either unintentional or is more about the mean person rather than about them, the less they personalize the meanness and the less impact it has on them.
MAY 15, 2011
New audios focusing on Sport Motivation, Intensity Training, and Sport Imagery Training!
MARCH 24, 2011
Many people struggle with forgiveness. Often, they either are unable to forgive or they forgive too quickly without fully processing their
emotions or resolving the situation. In which case, they haven't truly forgiven. Both of these situations involve an inability to navigate the
grief process.
MARCH 5, 2011
JANUARY 22, 2011
All emotions are normal. An emotion in and
of itself is not irrational. However, what
we decide based upon our emotions can be
irrational and lead to destructive behavior.
Although certain behaviors related to an
emotion can create problems, the emotion
itself may have some validity. The purpose
of emotions is to provide us with
information. Once we have the information,
we may then choose appropriate action.
However, as with any information, emotions
may be misunderstood. How we make sense of
an emotion may not always lead to the
accurate meaning of the emotion. Therefore,
our chosen actions may not resolve the
problem the emotion brought to our
attention, or may even create additional difficulties.
READ MORE
JANUARY 21, 2011
NEW "CRAZY-MAKERS" EXAMPLE:
Back-Stabbing
The co-worker who deliberately sabatoges your work:
An internet reader described the following situation: I work in a special needs preschool and I do circletime everyday.
When I was sick, I asked my co-teacher aide if she will do it for me and she said "Yes." I leave to go to the restroom
and return to see the head teacher doing circletime. The co-worker never says a word about why she didn't do it. Also,
she has deleted pictures used to document learning and when I restored them, she permanently deleted them and denied
it ever happened.
This reader gives a number of other examples, including behavior towards the special needs children, and states: I feel
guilty telling on her but am about to quit my job.
READ MORE
NOVEMBER 16, 2010
NEW QUESTIONNAIRES:
Personality Questionnaire: Are You A Leader?
Personality Questionnaire: Perfectionist or Efficient?
NOVEMBER 9, 2010
How Both Overly Positive and Negative Misperceptions of Performance Can Affect You
When individuals have an overly positive view of their performance, they are likely to engage in future "self-handicapping" which involves strategies to protect the self-esteem. For example, not studying enough for a test so as to blame future poor performance on the lack of preparation rather than the lack of ability.
However, an overly negative view of performance also affects future performance by causing self-doubt. Such individuals are also likely to engage in "self-handicapping." In addition, both types of misperceptions are associated with increased anxiety and lower levels of life satisfaction (Kim, et.al, 2010).
Individuals who have accurate perceptions of their performance are likely to be more motivated, less likely to engage in "self-handicapping," and are more satisfied in general (Kim, et.al, 2010).
Kim, Y., Chiu, C., and Zou, Z. (2010). Know thyself: Misperceptions of actual performance undermine achievement motivation, future performance, and subjective well-being. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 99, 395-409.
NOVEMBER 7, 2010
Being Mindful of Emotions Decreases Intensity
Researchers Kron et.al. (2010) found through a series of studies that the more an individual's
mind is occupied with mental activities, the less intense the emotional experience. Interestingly,
even if the assigned task is to focus on the emotions themselves, the individual still experiences
a reduction in the emotional intensity.
This may suggest a mechanism by which mindfulness impacts the emotional experience. During a
mindful state, an individual focuses completely on the emotions and often experiences a greater
tolerance of the emotional state and a decrease in intensity of the emotions. Therefore, when
faced with difficult emotions, a focus on emotions may be more effective than an avoidance of
emotions.
Kron, A., Schul, Y., Cohen, A. and Hassin, R. (2010). Feelings don't come easy: Studies on the
effortful nature of feelings. Journal of Experimental Psychology:General, 139, 520-534.
ALSO READ:
Why Are Meditative Relaxation and Mindfulness Important?
OCTOBER 17, 2010
Superman Effect? Wear Red to
Attract Women
Much research has been conducted regarding what characteristics attract the opposite sex.
Researcher Andrew Elliott and colleagues (2010) examined the effect of men wearing red
on women's perceptions of attraction. They found that women tended to be more attracted
to men wearing red or even standing in front of a red background. In addition, this effect
was consistent in three different countries.
They suggest this effect may be due to the perception of dominance that the color red
portrays. In addition, a man who wears red (such as a red tie) may also perceive himself
with greater status which may increase his self-confidence and assertiveness, and thus,
women.
Elliot, A.J., Kayser, D.N., Greitemeyer, T., Lichtenfeld, S., Gramzow, R.H., and Maier, M.A.
(2010). Red, rank, and romance in women viewing men. Journal of Experimental Psychology, 139, 399-417.
OCTOBER 8, 2010
Grief is Not Depression
Often, grief during bereavement may appear similar to depression and sometimes
individuals who are grieving may be treated for depression. However, in spite
of the similarities, grief and depression are not the same.
A significant difference between the two found by researchers Coifman and Bonanno
(2010) is that individuals who are grieving have more variability in emotional
responses, particularly the ability to experience positive emotions depending upon
the circumstances. For example, while grieving they may be able to share a funny
story about their loved one. Those with depression were less able to do engage in
this type of positive emotional response.
Coifman,K.G. and Bonanno,G.A. (2010). When distress does not become depression:
Emotion context sensitivity and adjustment to bereavement. Journal of Abnormal Psychology, 119,
479-490.
OCTOBER 7, 2010
Massage: Effects on Anxiety,
Depression, and Pain
Massage therapy has generally been overlooked in psychological research as a tool
to assist with managing conditions, both physical and mental, that are effected by
stress. However, Grant Rich (2010) reviewed the studies that have been conducted
and has drawn conclusions about the usefulness of massage therapy.
He indicates that research suggests that even a single session of massage therapy
can reduce the immediate symptoms of anxiety such as heart rate and blood pressure
and that multiple sessions can impact depression and anxiety on a long-term basis.
Although a single session of massage therapy does not impact pain, multiple sessions
have shown a reduction in pain including fibromyalgia, PMS, arthritis, back conditions,
and migraine headaches.
Rich, G.J. (2010). Massage therapy: Significance and relevance to professional practice.
Professional Psychology: Research and Practice, 41, 325-332.
OCTOBER 3, 2010
Laugh in the Face of Adversity:
Reducing Stress During Marital Conflict
Conflict usually causes physical effects of stress such as increased heart rate,
breathing, and muscle tension. These effects often lead to greater negative
perception and feelings of dissatisfaction in the marriage. However, researcher
Joyce Yuan and colleages (2010) found that positive emotion during the course of a
tense situation leads to a reduction in these physical effects.
Thus, couples who are able to laugh or respond positively to one another even when
discussing a difficult topic are able to reduce the stress of a tense situation.
As a result, they are likely to experience more satisfaction, in general,
regarding their marriage.
Yuan,J.W., McCarthy,M., Holley,S.R. and Levenson,R.W. (2010). Physiological
down-regulation and positive emotion in marital interaction. Emotion, 10, 467-474.
OCTOBER 1, 2010
Don't Be Too Unselfish in a
Group--You Might Be Removed
Why would group members get rid of a member who contributes significantly
to the group goal without asking much in return? It seems silly to sacrifice
the group goals to remove a contributing member.
Researchers Craig Parks and Asako Stone (2010) examined this common phenomena
and suggest that people don't want group members who exceed the norm and make
the others look bad if they don't meet the standard that is set. In addition,
some group members may perceive the unselfish member as a rule-breaker, and thus,
a threat to the cohesiveness of the group.
The problem with this attitude is that the group may lose a productive member
either through removal, the member quitting, or the member reducing productivity
in order to meet the group norm.
Parks,C.D. and Stone,A.B. (2010). The desire to expel unselfish members from the group.
Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 99, 303-310.
Previous

Some people may be curious as to why this website is
dedicated to the "pursuit of excellence" when I am
constantly warning about the dangers of
perfectionism. To address this question we must
differentiate between the pursuit of excellence and
the need to be perfect. These concepts are not only
different but can be considered antagonistic to one
another. In fact these concepts are so opposed to
one another that excellence can best be attained by
giving up the demands of perfection.
What is Perfectionism? Perfectionism
is the individual's belief that he or she must be
perfect to be acceptable. Perfectionism is black and
white with no gray area. Anything other than perfect
is failure. Perfectionism is an attitude, not
necessarily a behavior. In other words, two people
can engage in the same behavior such as trying to
win an Olympic gold medal but one can be pursuing
excellence and the other is demanding perfection.
The difference lies in the thought process about the
goal or behavior, not in the goal or behavior
itself.
READ MORE...


Listening to the weather forecast one frigid day, I
realized how much we are influenced by the
catastrophic thinking of the media. The weatherman
reported, "The weather has brought more
misery
to the St. Louis area." Certainly, the weather was
causing problems that day. An ice storm caused car
doors and locks to be frozen so that people had a
great deal of trouble getting into their cars.
However, I thought, unless someone was in the middle
of nowhere with no cell phone and they were unable
to open their car door because of the ice, this was
not "misery." Instead, I would call it an
"inconvenience." Most of us walked out to our cars
to find that we couldn't open the door, went back
inside a warm house or office, and found some
solution to our problem.
READ MORE...


For many years when my husband and I were first
together I would ask him "When are things going to
get better?" We were dealing with the usual
stressors that couples face: not enough time, not
enough money, and the inevitable random events such
as family conflict, deaths of loved ones, illnesses
and injuries. In addition, for most of our early
years together I was in school and struggling with
the balancing of demands of advanced education,
part-time work, and a family.
But I had the belief that we were working towards
this perfect life that one day would emerge shining
a rainbow of happiness forever over us. My husband,
inclined more toward the practical, just answered my
question of "When are things going to get better?,"
with "Another six months." That answer typically
pacified me for awhile because I thought I could
handle any amount of stress for six months.
However, a point would occur when I once again I
asked my husband "When are things going to get
better?" Once again, he would answer "Another six
months." This scenario occurred fairly routinely
for many years.
However, fortunately during this time I had
experiences that began to teach me about my
expectations of life. In particular, when I was
completing my internship at the Veterans
Administration Medical Center I had the opportunity
to work on the spinal cord injury unit. That
experience forever changed my thinking. In
particular, I was struck by the differences in
attitude among the patients.
READ MORE...
"Sometimes agendas are beneficent and
sometimes they are self-serving, but agendas
always exist. Therefore, to fully evaluate the
statistics, the agenda of the reporter needs to be
considered."

Not a day goes by when I don't throw down the
morning newspaper complaining about the use of
statistics in an article. In our world the media
liberally sprinkles statistics throughout articles
and television programs to support a point of view.
The problem, however, is that statistics are
frequently misleading if not outright inaccurate.
Without a clear understanding of the nature of
statistics and the definitions of statistical terms,
the public believe the statistic-supported
statements as if they are fact. In addition,
without understanding the agenda of the journalist
or analyst using the statistics, the public accepts
these "facts" uncritically.
READ MORE...


Frequently, I am asked how to handle irrational
jealous feelings. Usually, the individual
recognizes that her feelings are unreasonable with
no valid evidence but feels incapable of controlling
the jealousy. In addition, the person usually
recognizes the destructive nature of indulging in
the feelings and the resulting behavior. Such
behavior typically involves excessive questioning of
her spouse, suspiciousness, and accusations. Many
spouses become extremely frustrated with this
behavior because they have no way of proving their
faithfulness. This leads to an escalating cycle of
anger which is used as further evidence by the
jealous spouse that her suspicions are correct.

The jealous spouse often desperately wants to stop
the behavior but finds that he can't control the
thoughts which makes him feel miserable. He
believes that if he can just prove his suspicions
one way or another, he will feel better. The
unfortunate fallacy in this thinking, is that trust
can never be proven; it can only be disproved. The
definition of trust is the
belief that
something is true. Therefore, without evidence to
the contrary, if we want a satisfying relationship,
we have to
choose to trust the person we
love.
READ
MORE...

RECOMMENDED BOOKS...


"I
don't have any willpower."
"I'm weak."
"I'm lazy."
"I can't do it."
Do these statements sound familiar? Too often, our
self-statements about weight management interfere
with our efforts and lead to failure. By changing
how we think about developing a healthy weight we
are able to change the behaviors that can lead to
success.
Not long ago I conducted a little experiment with my
cardio-kickboxing class. After an intense class I
told them to get the heaviest weights they could
curl 8-10 times. I spent a minute telling them to
focus on feeling tired, that they had just worked
out hard and they couldn't do anymore. Then, they
were to curl the weights to exhaustion. Once they
finished, I spent another minute telling them to
focus on having energy, feeling good, feeling
refreshed, and knowing they could do more. Once
again, they lifted the weights to exhaustion. The
results were that out of nine people, only one did
fewer lifts the second time! And typically, when
someone lifts weights to exhaustion they should not
be able to lift as much the second time when it is
only a minute later. Although this was not a
controlled scientific experiment, it was a
demonstration to my class to show how powerful our
thinking can be. What this exercise showed was how
positive thinking overcame the natural exhaustion of
the body and created a self-fulfilling prophecy of
lifting more weight because the participants
believed that they could.
READ MORE...
